As we all watched Joan finally get her man, FINALLY, I think women everywhere were saddened by the ending that we all knew came far too soon. As happy as I was for Joan, I was disappointed that the finale didn't embody the true essence of what the show really meant to so many of us - The importance of sisterhood. The female bond. The friendship between a woman and her girls.
Much as we like Monica and the new flare that she adds, we all know that its just not quite the same without trifelin' Toni Childs. And yes, we were all FED UP with Joan's new uppity attitude when Toni was going through the whole custody battle and we knew that it was high time that Joan messed up since Toni had messed up SOOOO many times before...but didn't we all expect them to become friends again. I mean no one truly thought that it would remain like this...seasons later and Toni is STILL in NY....it's impossible. Joan will NOT be a part of Morgan's life...REALLY!!! I just knew that after a few episodes w/out her they would bring Toni back for a teary reunion show that would remind us all that no matter how much our friends mess up, they are still our GIRLS...
There's the code, you know sisterhood is blood..and blood is thicker than EVERYTHING. And yes, there are things that we in the real world say are unforgivable...like the age old "she slept with my man"...but Toni and Joan were even able to reconcile that situation. Amazing. We didn't think there was anything that their relationship couldn't make it through.
I didn't realize just how many women were rooting for Mya, Lynn, Joan and Toni. They were a group of friends that we all somehow could relate to. We all have a friend that reminds us of one of them, and we see so much of ourselves in another one. I realized not too long ago how many of my own friends love the show. Watching these women become each other's life lines was what made me and a lot of other appreciative women tune in (or tivo, should one be working late) every Monday night.
I was on the phone with two really good friends last week and while we caught up my friend Kris made a statement that we all know to be true (And Kelsey you can use this one in the reunion show)... We are all extremely independent and have rigorous schedules, but we have reached an understanding, a simple truth in our hearts that no matter the distance or time between us we remain close. And that is so true...when I think of my invaluable group of friends, the list of my ace chicks are not ones that I talk to everyday. They are strong women who have been there for me during one point in my life or another. Women that I could look to for advice, assistance, support or just to throw one back with. Women with shoulders of steel.
The point is we all know the extreme pricelessness of our girlfriends...how much we love them, need them, depend on them. Even if it's just to tell them a "girl, guess what happened...." story, your day seems brighter after you've had your dose of sisterhood. The forwards you get from them at work (Tenille), the phone calls when they are on their way home to pick up the baby (Cheryl), the emails of the upcoming shopping trips (Christel). The scriptures on your email (Contessa), the hey girl what're we doing this weekend (Crystal), the pics of the cutest nephew on the planet from the other side of the world (Ruthi). The ones who will give up t-shirts and their own bed when you come for a surprise visit (Kelli). The ones who you don't make a move unless you call them first (Takiyah). All of these are time-dated proof positives of the love that I share with my friends.
Like Toni and Joan, there are some of us that don't make it all the way through life's journey on the same path. There were still memories and lessons learned that no disagreement can ever take from us. The meaning and the importance of the bond that we shared at one point as friends is still essential, whether we are still thick as thieves or can't stand to be near one another. Whether we cross the finish line at the same point or miles apart, the fact that you've helped me through and I you at one point or another is still a valid reason as to why were both able to cross.
To all MY Girlfriends, my sisters, my friends, past and present, thank you for seeing me through. Thank you for the voicemail, the emails, the blogs, the texts and the stories of humanity and heroism. The smiles, the tears and everything else we have shared. My life wouldn't be the same without you all and I hope I have touched you ladies too. If I mentioned you or if I didn't, you spirited females are my circle. My support group, my AA cohorts and my celebrity gossip columnists. You never cease to amaze me with what you've accomplished, the kids that you make, the wonderful mates you choose and the strength that you all possess. I am a better woman having called you friend. All of you. Thanks for being my Girlfriends.
And Kelsey please bring Toni back for the final reconciliation, you have a million women who would love a happy ending with the WHOLE CREW....just a suggestion...